Tell me I'm not the only one
…who thinks this would make a great stamp.
Super Turbo Action Pig is today's finest App Store promo freebie. It's a version of the classic Chopper one-button helicopter game, except this time you're a swashbuckling pig on a revenge mission against an evil butcher.
There's nothing very remarkable about the gameplay of STAP, though it takes the less common approach of having your character at the right of the screen flying towards the left, which is in fact a lot more comfortable if you're right-handed. Only two things mark it out as noteworthy.
One is the gorgeous presentation, with fantastic cartoon graphics and animation, terrific control response, brilliant "chase" music and sound effects that would grace the finest Road Runner or Pink Panther episodes. The other is that it appears to have a finite length, requiring the player to collect five "Golden Sausages" for victory rather than going on indefinitely until you succumb to the airborne cutlery onslaught.
The sausages show up every 40 seconds or so, which means that beating the game always feels like a goal that you can achieve in under five minutes (though I've only managed to get two so far), making it perfect for the format. It also, importantly, makes you feel you have a chance of helping to actually help the cute porcine hero to victory, rather than just delaying his inevitable transition to pork chops.
That's about it, really. Super Turbo Action Pig is well worth the 59p it normally costs, but if you're quick you can get it for nothing and spend the money on a nice Galaxy Bubbles bar instead.
Remember, if you don’t have an iPhone or iPod Touch yet with which to enjoy the now-est gaming of the modern zeitgeist, you can still grab the games anyway with iTunes while they’re free, and upload them to your iPod when you get one.
And if you’re ready to join in the fun, you can do it at a giveaway price by subscribing to WoS, where subscribers learn how to pick up a brand-new 32GB 3rd-gen iPod Touch for just £6 – no strings, no contracts, no referrals, no getting other people do do anything, just a fun bit of exploiting capitalism for half-an-hour’s effort.