Shut up, cretins everywhere

Point 1: Kaka clearly, obviously, makes an active short jabbing motion with his elbow towards Keita's chest.

Watch the video by clicking the pic above and then clicking the "RED CARD" clip, particularly from 0.36 to 0.38. Watch Kaka's arm. I think the mistake people have been making so far is to watch the footage with their eyes closed and their brains replaced with a turnip.

Point 2: Watch Kaka's reaction. Is he surprised that someone's bounced off him and fallen to the ground? No. He knew Keita was coming and he did something about it. Note, incidentally, that at NO POINT does Keita look towards Kaka as he runs. He's watching the ball, not looking for a foul.

(He couldn't sensibly expect to get one even if he was, because at the time he can see that the ref is looking in a completely different direction from Kaka and him, and both linesmen are at least 60 yards away.)

Point 3: Look at how Kaka is standing in the first pic on this page. That's not someone standing around unsuspectingly being collided with from behind. Had Keita collided with him in this position, if Kaka wasn't moving his centre of gravity backwards at the time (for example, jabbing his elbow towards the Ivorian), he'd have been sent flying onto his face.

Point 4: Kaka doesn't then stand around looking surprised and confused when the furore blows up. He jogs off, as fast as decency allows, getting as far away as he can get from the situation, and hamming exaggeratedly to the bench that he knows nothing. As any remotely competent psychologist will tell you, it's absolute textbook guilty behaviour. Go on, find one and ask them.

Point 5: Keita's face-clutching at first seems reprehensible, but we can clearly see from the replay (at 38 seconds) that the left side of his head collides pretty forcefully with the side of Kaka's head (and/or possibly Kaka's shoulder), so he probably genuinely is in considerable pain. He certainly puts his left hand to that exact point of impact.

He's not playacting – he's just had a hefty bang on the noggin, regardless of whether anyone hit him there deliberately or not. (And Kaka certainly didn't deliberately hit him on the head. But that lack of intention doesn't mean Keita hasn't been genuinely hurt in the head.)

Even if he was faking it cynically, or just exaggerating a bit… well, welcome to karma, Brazil. And in any event it doesn't forgive Kaka elbowing him in the chest, which is a clear yellow card offence at least.

And let's remember, these hopeless BBC pundits and commentators who've started the Keita witch-hunt are the same ones who watched the slow-motion replay of Luis Fabiano's goal from the angle below and said "A suspicion of handball there? No."

Seriously, everyone, just shut the fuck up.

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11 Responses to “Shut up, cretins everywhere”

  1. I love you so much it hurts.

  2. Let's not talk about the scene they replayed when you can learly see the ref telling Fabiano "i saw your elbow on that play, but it was a nice goal". 

  3. I do talk about that on Goal Club…

  4. Arry Redknapp Says:

    you're the cretin, gamer geek!

  5. Sickboy Says:

    Heroically correct. Swoony pundit Brazil bias in full effect.

  6. Mm. Did you hear them going on about what a tragedy it was that "one of the game's great players" had been sent off? The tone of their comments was that really great players should be immune from sending-off no matter what they'd done.

  7. Sickboy Says:

    That's a classic pundit cliche, though. 'He's a genius, so it's a shame to see him doing something so unbefitting of genius…' As if really good football players can't also be typically flawed human beings.

  8. =/ i'm wondering why you are being so mean-spirited about this.. you can point out your facts simply without being so offensive if you are sure that your facts are right.
    for some of them, you are, definitely.
    in my country, analysts are going so far as to say kaka has shown his True Colours with the elbow jab and the angry attitude. so you can't generalise so far as to say everyone's witch hunting for keita :s
    i watched the match too. and the commentator did not ignore the handball. it was an english commentator, too, if i remember correctly. he called it a handball. and said that there would be controversies about it. also, he pointed out the exchange between fabiano and the referee. that goal shouldn't have been counted. 
    but i cannot agree with you on the collision between keita and kaka. kaka Did shove his elbow at keita's chest. but the speed at which they collided was too damn small for keita to be so hurt. also, his FACE got hurt? :s when u push someone away with your elbow, can't really see heads butting. the image you've put up makes it seem like keita was putting his head on kaka's shoulder to lie on there. they both were looking at the ball. 
    also, are we just going to ignore all the times brazilians were tackled by the ivorians? kaka alone had been tackled several times. in the last minutes, the ivorians were very aggressive. everyone was.
    i'm sure you've watched this but please do again. 



    just saying that you should give everyone the benefit of the doubt here. we watched the replays a million times. they didn't. 
    you also missed mentioning the fact that since the referee (or for that matter, Anybody) wasn't looking in their way, keita could have been thinking about fooling everyone to get kaka sent off since it was illegal for any contact to happen when the ball wasn't with them. psychologists can't know everything. and neither can you. neither can i. 
    where was karma when the brazilians won with kaka being sent off in a moment where it didn't even matter and won't be at a game which doesn't matter either? the brazilians' winning doesn't revolve around kaka. 
    it is always a shame to see players going off. no matter who it is. but it is particularly shameful to see great players being sent off. they are as human as the rest of us. but it's shameful because they are supposed to At Least Try to set an example for the rest of the footballing world. and to keep the spirit of the game alive for us.

  9. Absolutely – it was bizarre that nobody felt it necessary to point out that Kaka had clearly had a dig at him. And being cracked by someone's elbow is going to smart a bit, even if you're not running at them foolishly looking the other way. Really really odd, to the point where I just instinctively want to disagree with them – witness Mark Bright talking about "two players offside there the referee's missed" as Chile put a shot in from range earlier. From range. So arguably those two players weren't missed, just not interfering. Commentary has improved immeasurably on the 'learning foreign names and pronunciation' and 'knowing about these mysterious players who have not played in the premier league' front, but there's a long way to go.

  10. Stikleprick Says:

    How come you have only published comments that agree with your ludicrous opinion backed up with opinons posing as facts?

    • Because the one I deleted contained phrases including “cause niggers brain are too dumb to see where the pain is coming from”. Welcome to your demographic.

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